I’ve loved books for as long as I can remember. When I was a child and my mother finished washing the evening dishes, she’d read to me. We’d sit on the green carpet of the living room with our backs against the gold and white couch. She’d read books like Curious George and Little Black Sambo in her quiet soothing voice. I always enjoyed listening to the stories, but I wanted to learn to read so that I could read to myself.
When I was in first grade I read Go Dog Go by myself. One weekend morning while my parents still slept, I got up and turned up the thermostat in our house. I went to our living room where two large, comfortable chairs bracketed a wall heating vent. I laid on the floor with my feet on the warm vent and my head poking out between the chairs and read the whole book. When my parents woke up and I told them what I’d done, they were proud. It’s one of my favorite childhood memories.
Eventually, I got a job in a bookstore and started buying books at a 30% discount. It was heaven. I kept every book I purchased and whenever I looked at one of the books on my bookshelf I felt a jolt of excitement and energy. I cherished all my books, but I began collecting a lot of books.
At the turn of the century, we moved into our current home. I have a home office with twelve built in book shelves and two large book cases. My office was filled with books. Every shelf was overstuffed with books stacked on top of the books running across the shelf. I had a built-in desk that was completely buried by books that ran across the entire back on the desk and several two foot stacks across the front of the desk. I even had books stacked on the floor.
There were two problems with this. First, my wife wanted to use the built-in desk and she repeatedly pleaded with me to create space for her. Second, I wanted a place to meditate and my office was the logical place, but the clutter was not conducive to meditation.
I finally decided to clear out some of the books. I made a rule that I’d give away any old fiction or obsolete non-fiction books. I started removing the books and, to my surprise, it felt good. In fact, it felt so good, I eliminated about half the books I owned. Not only was the desk completely clear, some bookshelves were only half full.
After I was done, I felt a new sense of peace and freedom. My wife was shocked and elated - she said that in the twenty-five years we had been married she’d never seen me do anything like this. I replied that the books were just baggage and I didn’t need them anymore. They prevented me from being present by always rooting me in the past.
We all hold on to THINGS with sentimental value, but many of them just make it harder to live in the present. What THINGS would you be better off eliminating?
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Tags: Psychology
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Wow! What a great story/analogy! I know exactly where you’re coming from with the books. I have a piece of flair on my Facebook that says: “Whenever I get a little money, I buy books. And if there’s any money left over, I buy food and clothes.”
For the past few months, though, I’ve been doing a lot of decluttering (slowly, not all in one fell swoop like you did), and I came to realize the same thing…a lot of the “stuff” I keep is really “baggage”, and I’m happier without it. Not just the books, but trinkets, old CDs that I never listen to anymore, stuff that I never use around the house…lots of stuff. I find that the more I get rid of, the more peaceful my place becomes.
Hi Roger,
I totally identify with this. I avoid bookstores now because once I walk in, I come out with about 10 books or as much as I can carry. When I moved house a few years ago, half the boxes were filled with books, while the other half were the rest of my life. Like you, I gave lots away to charity a few years back and it was so painful, and sometimes I still miss some of those books, but on the whole the space and the peace of mind make up for it.
@Jay: I think this is the beginning of a decluttering process for me as well. It felt good the first time, so I assume it’ll feel good the next time as well.
@Daphne: I expected it to be more painful for me as well, but it wasn’t. I kept thinking that I can always get this book out of the library. I really like the how clean my office looks now.
Hi, Roger! I’m a total bibliophile, like you. I dream of one day having a personal library like the one at the Biltmore Estate… with the giant fireplace, and comfy chairs, and the little ladder that slides around on a rail (and the butler who brings me tea!) I don’t want any of the rest of the house, just the library.
But, when we moved to Costa Rica a couple of years ago, we sold our house with everything in it. We took photo albums and personal stuff like that, but we left ALL the furniture, art, rugs, even the silverware in the drawers! I cheated a little because I donated about 14 boxes of books to the local library, where I figured they could benefit more people.
Point being: we shed the baggage… ALL the baggage, even some of my favorite “baggage”! It was a little tough, but it feels wonderful to travel so light through life.
I have a hard time letting go of books myself. This post has inspired me to take a look at my bookshelves and see which ones I can kick to the curb (and by that I mean donate to my local library). Getting rid of the old and making room for the new is always such a good feeling. I’m really good at doing this with clothes, but books are a different story…
@Lisis: I’ve been to the Biltmore Estate and I remember the library. It is beautiful, but I prefer the freedom of fewer belongings.
@Postively Present: I hope it feels as good to you as it did to me. You reminded me that I need to do the same things with my clothes.
Hi Roger,
Before I was married, my entire place was filled with books. When I moved out of my own place, I only kept the books I really wanted.
Now in our home office, there are two pretty decent size bookcases. I have one filled with all my books. I only keep books that I know I will need or read again in the future. Everything else I donate to the library or to friends. It is always nice to pass on the joy of reading!
Nadia,
It sounds like you already have a great strategy for managing your stuff. I also find that much of the information that I used to find only in books is now available on the internet.
It was only recently that I decided to through and cull a whole lot of my books. It was along with a general decluttering of all my possessions. I grew up with a father who kept hundreds if not thousands of books in our house and I guess I just absorbed the habit.
Now I still keep the gems but I’m happy to give away books that I have read but will most likely never read again.
I think the reason I liked holding onto books wasn’t for myself but in case other people wanted to read them. The thing is no one ever did, so they are better off in a library or a secondhand bookshop where someone who can use them will find them.
Hi Roger,
I love books too, but I sure have noticed what a relief it is to get rid of things. I think the fewer possessions you have, the more you appreciate each one. Especially with books, you always pass them on to somebody who will appreciate them more.
@Tom: Good for you! I guess in the back of my mind I thought my sons might want to read some of the books, but they never wanted to.
@David: Absolutely! I’m just getting started with eliminating more stuff from my life.
Roger,
Like you and, I think, everyone else who’s commented so far, I have a thing for books and it is a constant effort to make choices about what to keep, what to give away and what to buy or not buy.
As for other items of sentimental value, I happen to be working on an ongoing photography project about this very thing. I call it Want Not/Have Not
The gist of the idea is that I’ve got any number of items that have sat in boxes and corners and on shelves for years and years. I decided that if they mean so much to me, I’d photograph them for posterity, then give them away or throw them away, whatever applies.
I haven’t got very many of the photos up on my website, but if you look, you’ll get the gist. These things date as far back as childhood.
Adam,
What a great idea!
I looked at the website and I’m sure the photos make it easier to let go of things. You might be able to general site for others to use for these types of photos.
Books are definitely great!
Books are portable and can be used for any occasion:
-riding in a car
-waiting for doctor, dentist
-as a pass time to relax
-for reading to our children
-for learning and doing research
the list goes on and on
thank goodness for books
let the decluttering begin!
Vincent,
Books are very portable which is one of the things that make them great! I still love reading them.
I’m not going to buck the trend .. I also love books, but I don’t hold onto them. I tend to give them away often. here are very few books I keep (some especially meaningful ones, ones I know I’ll read again and some reference books). If someone asks to borrow I book I say ‘No, but you can have it’. I gave up tracking all the books I’d lent out and this seemed a much better way of managing it.
I also try not to hold onto things for anything other than practical reasons and some sentimental reasons (a few photos, a few cards and pictures made by my daughters when they were growing up). I found these things do take energy and I’m freer without them.
Ian,
I think you’re ahead of me. I still need to get rid of many more things.
I like the idea of just giving away books to friends that want to read them.
Congratulations on decluttering your books! I used to keep all of mine, but I’ve gotten much better through the decluttering process. I now keep reference books & a few that have special meaning to me.
I’ve also given up keeping magazines (I like anything with words in it…). I keep only a few at a time.
I’ve gotten rid of tons of stuff, but still have more to go. My real weakness is anything related to my sons’ childhoods. I need to let go of more of those things, especially the ones my sons don’t feel the need to keep.
Diane,
Thanks! I threw out many magazines also.
I can understand keeping things related to your sons’ childhood, since I have two sons myself. Fortunately, my wife manages that and has already cleaned out all but a few things.
A great way to get rid of those books that you no longer want can be found at bookcrossing.com.